September 8th, 2007

It's a Girl

the last month has been a blur. Work has been busy as the Kerberos Consortium prepares for its September 27 launch. A lot of contracts are still hanging in the air. The deals with the largest sponsors take the longest to conclude because the price tags are larger and everyone wants to spend more time balancing the value proposition. It is hectic and stressful. However it's also quite educational: I'm realizing that I could actually do this myself if I had to in the future. I'm glad that I'm not responsible for the business side of things this time, but I am also learning that I do understand that side of things and I could take that role in the future. The emotional cost in terms of stress and invested energy is high; I think I feel it more than some business people I've known.

However my mind has not really been on work. It's been on my daughter as she grows and develops inside of Margaret and on the plans to form our family. Last month when I announced the big news I said we had not chosen to find out what sex our baby is. We decided to find out August 31. It was clearly the right decision: it is much easier to focus on building a relationship and place in our mind when you can focus on pronouns, and even begin to attach names to the baby. I'm getting very excited about the prospect of living with Margaret and raising a child with her and Kevin. It's going to be a huge change, but I think it's going to be worth it.

Over the last month plans for the move have continued to form. The logistical side is what you'd expect. There's also been a strong emotional component though. At the beginning of August, we had a fairly good rational understanding of what we wanted to accomplish. August has seen sort of a complex emotional dance as we move closer to feeling confident in our shared vision to start believing in it and to really internalize it. From my standpoint, I'm much more confident that I'm welcome to join Margaret and Kevin's home and in my belief that this will be a successful three-way partnership. Thinking to the future, I'm as happy as I've ever been.